Here is the Juggler way:
Think about what you would want an interaction with a girl to be like if there was no need to get sex. Let’s say that sex was a given. You did not need to do anything tricky or run ‘game’ to score. How would you like that interaction to be? Myself I want it to be fun, exciting, relaxed, playful and sharing with each other willingly. Now think about how you can make that happen. Would you use tricks or be sneaky to get a girl to be that with you? No, that would be counter productive and/or unnecessary work. You would instead lead her by being fun, relaxed, sharing, or whatever you want the interaction to be like yourself and learn to allow and encourage her to be that as well.
It is just that most people have no idea how to allow and help someone achieve this place. Now the big mental step. Sexuality is not that big of a deal. Sure it has more important implications as far as chance of pregnancy, disease and emotional connotations. But from a ‘who has the power’ point of view it should be regarded the same way as having fun or any of the things you want an interaction to be – it should have nothing to do with power.
Style you are a great person. You have many of the skills for doing this method. You are an amazing and cool person. Much of what you do with women is so unnecessary. If you would just take the chance of directly being the great you that you are then you would not need so much of this extra stuff. I think you are afraid of your own greatness and maybe dealing with some of the reactions you would get that comes with letting that person out. Sometimes you seem so close to making this shift. Ah, but anyway you are a good friend so I have time to convince you.
What I am talking about is amazing. It can make a very intimate real connection very quickly – with super hot babes or anyone else for that matter. It has been shown to me to be very powerful in many, many contexts. It is based on universal truths. And as you know, I can not demonstrate the more intimate aspects to anyone’s satisfaction because of the LTR I am in. But don’t confuse the message with the messenger. I usually get out of interactions after hooking a girl because I know the danger and power of the way and to keep my promise to my lovely girlfriend. That is the weakness in my workshops but not in the way. Sex and intimacy flow very easily out of this place. But I will have to think, maybe there is a way to demonstrate this. Anyway, it amazes me how good of friends we are and yet I still haven’t cleared all this up with you. I do actually think it is a tribute to how much fun we have together that we never get around to talking much ’shop’. It’s either that or my inability to articulate it all. However, it should all be clear once I finish my book.

On approach PUA should follow the 90-10 rule. That is you must be prepared to supply 90% of the conversation because she will only give you 10%. She is experiencing a dramatic state change and needs time to warm up to the conversation. Most guys fail to realize this and work from the frame that they should supply 50% like a normal conversation. Of course, the girl only gives 10%. That adds up to 60% which is not the 100% which you need. The conversation then crumbles and the guy goes away thinking that the girl does not like them or they didn’t use the right opening or whatever. So what you are doing is pretty good for the beginning of the interaction. As you said, you “blast through”. You just need to give her more opportunity to respond but be ready to jump in when she can not.

What you can frequently do is ask very open ended questions which she has never heard before. You want her to give you a great answer but you are not expecting her to. You are prepared either way. If she does give a great answer you can use the feelings off of it. If she answers with,” Um… I don’t know.” Then you can further clarify the question. This clarifying takes the form of you giving her an example from your life. ie the answer you would give to the question.

Example:
You: What did you want to be when you were ten years old?
Her: What? I don’t remember.
You: Well that is too bad because it is useful to remember. If we can get in touch with our passions we had at that time we can learn alot about what gets us excited today. For instance, when I was ten I knew exactly what I wanted to be.
Her: What did you want to be?
You: I wanted to be an astronaut. I even had this great way of training. I had a globe in my room and I would spin it and then quickly climb up onto my bunk bed and lean over like this and pretend I was floating around the Earth. (Pause) When my sister would come in the door she would be the space alien. (Zap zap) Now, once you warm her up she will begin to give more and more umph to the conversation. As her input grows you should give her the room to take more of the conversational workload.

Calibration
Me: “Are you gonna actually read on the bus?”
HBGrad: “Yeah, I have a midterm next week”
You went in cocky and funny. Fine, but keep in mind that C&F doesn’t work when you have someone who does not play along. So here you should have tasted her mood and played to it. Our targets will not always respond how we would like them to. You should have listened and sympathized. “I know what that is like. I once had to prepare for a French test in the back of a fishing boat. Oh and I see you are studying anatomy. That can be real challenging. But it will be useful once you get through it. So many careers use a knowledge of the body.” If that gets her talking then great. The key is to listen to your audience. You can move them later but at the beginning you should try to be in synch. But if she continues to be unresponsive then go on to talk with other people nearby – she may come around. But this continual trying to force a conversation is below your dignity. Never look like you are trying.

Adding Restrictions
If I accept Wednesday (it seems to be okay for me, otherwise I would decline), would that be supplicating?
The secret here is to tag your own restrictions on too. For instance tell her, “Wednesday is fine but it will have to be between 8 and 10pm.” Do you think going to the shopping center with her, and having her shop me clothes would be a good thing? That is a great idea. She can then take a personal interest in you. Buy a shirt she picks out. And if you can, go to a shopping mall she has never been before – in unfamiliar territory she will bond closer to you. Her: “Call me back in an hour.” You: “Unfortunately, I’ll be busy then. Got to take the dog in to get his hair done. I might get him a mullet or a MR. T. cut. Anyway, I’ll try to call you later tonight or another time.”

Having said that, if they ask, I tell them I am broke, I drive a compact car and my job provides little security. And yes I do know how to make the most of these things. Being broke becomes a NEG. Driving a little car is a chance for humor (I’m tall) And my job – well it is very creative. I do exactly what you say women would not respond to D and do, what you might call ‘fairly well’ with the girls. But returning to the subject. One of my favorite things to tell girls is about a vivid dream I had years ago which is still imprinted in my memory. I view it as a premonition. It’s about how I dreamt one day I will have a small house on the beach, a lovely wife and two beautiful blonde daughters. We have fires on the beach at night and we are really happy. I really think this will be my life one day. The point is not to put the girl in a mood or any of that. I really enjoy telling people about this because it says a lot about me and what I want out of life. Now, if I instead make up a story of some dream that would impress a girl or get her horny, maybe it would work to accomplish that purpose but it would not further my skill at relating what I really want, my focus in life or my alpha-ness. It would be a short term gain at the sacrifice of long term progress. Rather, the art of the lie is the act of demonstrating to her that you can participate in a fantasy. First of all, there is no ‘art’ to lying. Telling a fib is easy. Making the truth exciting is art. Secondly, to her you and your life might as well be a fantasy. Instead of bringing her into an unreal fantasy, you can bring her into the fantasy which is the real you.

You know that the mind encompasses both reality and unreality. You know that things will always be better in the fantasy universe, and you know how to access that universe and make it tick for her, give her pleasure, increase her REAL awareness of how great life can be. You touch her emotions, and even if they are fantasized feelings, she still feels them. It is much more satisfying for you to touch her emotions with the truth. Pick up isn’t about giving women what they say they want. It isn’t about giving women what they think they want. But it also isn’t about giving women what they actually DO want, either. It’s about giving women what they respond to, and bringing about that response that you want to bring about. Pick up is not about her. It is about YOU. It should always be about improving your skills. Lies make pick-up easier. You should be trying to make pick-up harder. Like lifting weights. You are not a man who is required to live his life in order to please other people. It is not about pleasing her. It is about being able to be the real you. That is the alphaness so many guys search for. It is the ability to confidently put the real you out there. But the point is that you should be up front and real about the important stuff because that is important to YOU.

You get what you ask for. The question most guys should spend much more time on – that will pay off bigger than time spent coming up with clever patterns is, “What do you really want?” When you can answer that then you will have a good base to begin from. That is where you should begin. Not, “What will get her feeling horny?”. This lying thing is also a confidence issue for many guys. They don’t think that their life is good enough, so they rely on lies to become interesting. They search for good material, never realizing that it is not the material, but the way it is presented that is so crucial and that they ARE interesting enough. Now, having said all that, there are those lies which are just plain fun. A few openers are like that. But the point is these have little or nothing to do with mis-representing yourself. You should always represent the real you. You are more than equal to the task.

Body Language
Eyes – Don’t just look, express. If she can see you looking then she can see your expressions.
But here is a rule of thumb, don’t look at a woman when she is far away– that takes no courage – all the losers do that. Instead, get real close and then look at her seductively – only PUA do that. Then sarge away.
Body language – open posture. hands down to the sides when walking, out of pockets. Sitting – take up as much room as possible. Talking with a HB – making gestures to strength points and applying kino.

Balance of Power
Yep, you gave her a point. But try not to worry about giving away ‘points’. You can fix it after the fact. Matter of fact, I give away points all the time. It’s a good thing. Don’t be afraid to give her points. Just learn how to get points for yourself. Then you are seducing through action (saying whatever you want without much inhibition) and not inaction (being careful what you say so as not to supplicate or give away stuff). Always choose action.
You do this by mastering the fine art of forcing, prompting and cajoling HER actions. It is not your words and actions that lose the seduction. It is her lack of matching those words and actions. To be sure you can get your points before or after you give her points. For example in your situation you said, “Nice talking to you.” Point
for her. But then you can prompt her to give you a point, “This is where you are supposed to say how wonderful it has been talking to me.”See, even after the fact of giving her a point, you can keep things balanced.
Now weather she says those exact words or laughs or bitches or whatever, it is not really important. You are letting her know that you expect as much from her as you are giving yourself. That keeps both of you working to make things happen.
There are many different timings you can use to apply this principle. Most of the time I try to get her to give me a point first. ie “How much do you like me?” or “You want to see me as soon as possible don’t you?” or “Tell me you find me ravishingly sexy.” …that sort of thing. But you can even give her a point and then go a long time before you cash in and ask for your reciprocating point. The key here is to link the two. For instance, you can start off a conversation with, “I think you are the most amazing person I have ever met.” Then go on and have a
ten minute conversation then out of the blue say, “Now it is your turn, you are amazing. Now tell me what I am?”
Her mind whirls and clicks and she now knows that she did not get a point free and clear after all. She now has even more respect for you. Cause not only are you an non-supplicating guy who insists the seduction be evenly worked but you are a confidently patient guy too. Now, if the girl declines to give you a point, it is implicit that the
point you gave her is negated. She will understand this instinctively. But if you want, you can actually say, “I take it back…”If you ask for your point before you give her a point and she gives you shit or gives you an insult this is not a bad thing. You just repay her in kind.
Example:
You: “How much do you like me?”
Her: “I don’t like you at all.”
You: “Good, Cause I can’t stand to be around you.”
See….it’s balanced.
Also, it is important to always reward her giving you a point by giving her a point in return. Maybe not immediately, it can be fun for her to sweat it a little, but you must give it to her or you will get things out of balance, too much power on your side, and she will give you hesitancy about moving the seduction to more intimate levels.
It is not human interaction. It is human transaction.
Your instincts are correct. It is an out of balance power issue.
You always having to ask her to come over and you having to work around
HER schedule is putting you in a weakened position.
If you sometimes went to your place and sometimes hers and she didn’t have a zillion activities in her life then the situation would be more balanced.
You need to create balance. Try rephrasing your requests for her presence. Make it about her needs but your schedule. For instance say to her, “I’m free Thursday after 7. Come over and I’ll do that thing you always like with my tongue and the feather.”At the the same time encourage her to call you and and ask herself over to please your needs. Say, “It’s alright to call me up and ask to come over. Anytime, so long as you are bringing some massage oil or my favorite icecream.” Here it is allowed to be about her schedule so long as it is about your needs.
See, it’s all balanced.
About time issues…
Funny, but my primary and I were just lying in bed this morning discussing how we are going to fit our time together into our lives. She is also a very busy girl, only 19 and lives with her parents. In our case, she feels she has been neglecting important aspects of her life to spend time with me. And I agree. I want her to keep her focus.
So we worked out a schedule. We won’t see quite as much of each other during the day, but most nights she will still be able to curl up in bed with me at 1 am after she finishes her practice. So I know this is just a your FB but consider maybe working out a consistent schedule that works for both of you.

What are you doing?
(Really depends on what you are doing but..)
Well, I was just doing a bit of shopping and decided I needed a cup of something sweet and warm.. then Ive got a few other bits to get and I can go home. I’m not really a great shopper but, when I see something I like, I just have to grab it ..

How about you?
How was your weekend?
Excellent Thanks, Met up with some old friends went down the pub Saturday.. On Sunday, took the mountain bike up to the hills just to blow away the weeks cobwebs.. you know, Adrenaline is great, that first rush of trying something a bit dangerous, where you might get hurt, but its only temporary, it goes away, but the memory of that experience stays with you… blah blah blah…

What’s your name?
Martin De Porres, I was named after a catholic saint famous for his healing touch and martyred for witchcraft.. Not really, Its (my real name) why do you ask ? that would tend to be what comes out of my mouth anyway..

PUA Psychology
I agree that to be successful in this art you must have very real perceptions. However, I disagree with your assessment that every girl and situation is different. Once a PUA has many many approaches and pick-ups under his/or her belt that artist will see many repeating patterns which happen again and again.
To a beginner the field looks chaotic. Only to an experienced eye is there order. It IS correct to make generalizations. The human mind works best with patterns and structures. Patterns and structures give us a leg up in the world. That is why it took IBM many years, a heck of alot of money and huge computers to beat our best human chess player. The problem for beginners is that, as they begin to make generalizations, they fall into the mistake of making unproductive and false generalizations. Does that mean they should stop making generalizations and quit looking for patterns? No. Because once they learn the correct generalization and patterns, their pick-up ability will increase many fold. For instance, when I or any of the more experienced PUA around here spot a mixed group, we can size them up quickly and decide which angle to approach and who to talk to first, etc.. We decide this in an instant based on many other experiences. We know the pattern. The situation is much more predictable for us than it would be for a beginner. Now sometimes we are surprised and things do not go as we suspected:
Chatting up this girl in line and leaving her on a light SOI surprisingly did not make her seek me out inside the club.

In those cases the new information is examined to see why it did not fit the pattern: Okay, this girl was with a very dominant friend who probably decided where they went. This new information is filed away for further investigation and possible small modification to the larger pattern or maybe to birth a new pattern thus giving rise to a new counter technique. It is like statistics. When a beginner gets started he makes all kinds of generalizations. As he gains more and more experience (information), these generalizations continually get modified until he has an increasing accurate picture of the patterns. When he starts off, his generalized picture gets drastically changed on almost a daily basis. As he progresses, the changes become smaller and smaller until there is rarely a change in his view of the patterns in even a week of approaches. However, Next Level, I do agree with what I think is your underlying theme of your post. Making generalizations should not keep beginners from approaching. It is just that beginners need to judge away. And keep making lots of approaches to learn if those judgements are correct.

Coffee Table
Don’t throw away those old phone numbers. Here is what to do. Save each bar napkin, business card, McDonalds wrapper or whatever scrap of paper which a girl has written her number on. After you accumulate a bunch, take the best hundred, preferably with girls you sexed or had spectacular crashes with, and make a coffee table. Buy a new, unpainted table, place the phone numbers on the top at random directions and apply a lacquer finish. After it drys, apply another. Keep this up until you have a thick, clear, smooth finish with all the phone numbers embedded inside. It’s the ultimate conversation piece.

Control of Relationship
You make some interesting points. I see a little more of where you are coming from. You are not interested in the sex that particular night but control of the whole relationship and thus control of all future sex. But maybe I think about sex different than you. All of my MLTR have been very pleasurable. Never have had to worry about who controls the fun.
If you took the time and energy you put into figuring out all the ways to manipulate the relationship and put it into improving your sexual technique, she will never consider using sex as a control weapon. After you are a sex-god she will have to control you by hiding the TV remote or something. Really, control should be a non-issue. When you are really good at all aspects of your pick up and relationship life, it will cease to be a concern. Ferrari does not have to trick its customers to stay with the brand. They just build a great car. But if you are Ford – you have to manipulate the heck out of your customers. Be a Ferrari. Spend your time improving yourself. Relationships will come and go – even this one despite your very smart maneuvers. You will have no use for control when you become good at all aspects of yourself.
Look in the mirror. Be honest. Look deep down and find out where you can improve. Maybe you are a sex god. But maybe you need to be more affectionate. – I don’t know. Maybe you are perfect. Maybe you are
perfect and you flaunt it in her face – fix that. Whatever it is, there is always room to get better. You may not have imagined how good you can become.
Anytime a person has to control another, it is a lack of confidence in their life somewhere. As far as Svengali’s rule #10 I have always read it as: Give her something to push against occasionally. Something UNIMPORTANT or she might find something important. Seems you are battling over the whole relationship. I usually let girls spar over the color of my socks.

Turning the Tables
Well here are some techniques that you may find helpful. Let’s start with my favorite, Mind fucking. Mind fucking is an art all to it’s own. it involves a series of giving her something like compliments or agreement or anything that she would like. Then pulling it away in the next sentence. It can also be done the other way – starting with the NEG followed with a positive. Take – give – take – give. In and out – mind fucking. It can be tremendous fun
and is best done with a sense of humor.
Example:
You: “You have a bad attitude.”
Her: “What are you talking about?”
You: “You better straighten up. I can replace you like that. (snap fingers)
Her: “I am not bad.”
You: “Okay, come here. You know a little attitude is sexy.” (hug) “You smell good. have you been eating salmon?”
These may not be the best examples for your situation. Mind fucking is a highly customized thing based on the particulars of your relationship. What is important is that you get a feel for the basic back and fourth of the technique. Mind fucking will make her constantly unsure and careful with you. But at the same time you will become more exciting in her eyes. Hoops are probes for insecurity disguised as questions. Girls will always hold of hoops and expect you to jump through them. Some people call these shit tests.
Examples:
” Are you a player?”
” How tall are you?” – if you are short
” Why should I care about you?”
etc..
” Why don’t you wash your car?”
She is counting on the shit test to throw you off your game. Most people, given a test like this will try to answer correct. But that is just what you want to avoid. It is not really a serious question. She wants to test you to see if you can be rattle and just how much power she has over you. Now, many times you can answer these questions as straight as possible or in a way which actually makes you look worse. She will not expect this. She is counting on you being frazzled. She is counting on you to want to answer correctly. When she sees you don’t care if you say the ‘right’ thing then you demonstrate you do not need her – that is the correct attitude.
Example:
Her: “Are you a player?”
You: “Yes.”
Her: “How tall are you?”
You: “5 foot 4 inches”
Her: “Why don’t you wash your car?”
You: “Because I don’t care.”
Never get defensive about a hoop being held in front of you. This is what she wants – to play on your emotions and insecurities. Another way of answering a hoop is to not answer at all. Instead you grab the hoop out of her hand and make her jump through it. (Mystery)
Her: “Why don’t you wash your car?”
You: (ignoring the question) Are you going to wear that?
Turn around is not so much a technique as it is an attitude. The idea is that you do not make any inadequacies which she may find in you, about you. Instead they are about her feelings or about her need to judge. This mirrors reality because what bothers us about other people usually reminds us of a lack in our own life. Turn around simply points this out. You keep the emphasis on her. No matter the temptation you never allow your emotions to be engaged. You never even use the word” I”. Then once you figure out what she wants specifically then you can get her to work for that thing. You turn around the situation to your favor. Kind of evil huh?
Her: “You went to get food and you didn’t get me anything?!”
You: “Did something happen in your past to give you abandonment issues?”
Her: “Don’t change the subject. Why didn’t you think of someone besides yourself?”
You: “Did you have a hard day?”
Her: “Yes, I did. And now I’m dying of hunger thank you very much.”
You: “Okay, If you were to order food. what would you want?”
Her: “A chicken sandwich with barbecue sauce and fries.”
(Once you know here what she specifically wants you can trade for it)
You: “Okay, I’ll tell you what. Rub my back for ten minutes and I’ll go back out and get your sandwich. You have money?”
Remember if you can find out what someone wants specifically you can get them to do all kinds of things by dangling that thing in front of their eyes. You should make her work for anything she wants from you. Humans never appreciate anything they are given for free. Keep this dynamic up at all times. Even if it is her birthday and you have a gift for her. Tell her she has to be real nice or she will not get her present. Even if you want to have sex with her. Make her work as much as possible for it: “I’m not going to give you an orgasm until you tell me how great I am.”Stuff like that. You can say it with a playful attitude and it will still have an effect. Stick to your guns but have fun.
In conclusion:
Never let your emotions be engaged. At the same time work on playing her emotions. Be good at spotting hoops and dealing with them. Set some hoops up yourself. Mindfuck, mindfuck, mindfuck. Turn around any situation you feel is being played against you so that it works in your favor. There is of course much more to the art of turning the tables. Will post more as needed.

What to Say vs. How to Say
Keep in mind that it is not what you talk about that matters so much as how you talk about it. Make your ’situation’ interesting and people will talk about you all day. This includes ‘negative’ things. You want to get better at expressing yourself at all times. This includes when you are angry or sad. Your life is a play and your world is a stage. Practice by telling people what is inside. When you go see a good movie or a play you are not turned off by the actor’s negative emotions and situation. Instead you are drawn in deeper.
You can talk about the bad things in your life. Just don’t do it in a complaining way – that is not attractive and is not about your humanity. I’ll show you the difference:
” I found out today that my company is laying me off. What a bunch of jerks. They give themselves bonuses earlier this year and now they are letting half the research staff go.” See that is complaining. There is nothing about you in there. It is about everything outside of yourself. That makes for dull and monotonous listening. Everybody talks like this and it sucks.
Now compare to the following.” I found out today that my company is laying me off. I feel betrayed
and a little lost.” Okay, maybe not an opener, but you see the difference. The first one leads to a conversation about the bad world that sucks the life out of people. The second leads to a conversation about inner feelings and values. It is not so difficult to imagine a girl suggesting, “Maybe it is a time to make a fresh start and the beginning of a new adventure.” Also don’t be afraid to let a girl take charge and mother you a little in times when you are feeling down. And letting others into your world might also get you cheered up along the way.
Always feeling like you must be in a good mood or always ‘on’ in order to be attractive is a mistake that many guys fall into. They may even get really good at getting girls as long as they are in ’state’ but then never feel like it is them getting girls but a character that they play. You don’t want to do be that way. Instead, realize that what is attractive is your range of human essence. Show all emotions. What you want to be is confident enough to ‘think aloud’. Sure, sometimes you are not going to feel like talking to anyone or sharing your problems. But I recommend pushing yourself past your comfort zone with this. Try just talking with friends about your life when you wouldn’t ordinarily share and speak deeper and more from the heart.